Kindness and all forms of child abuse can have a profound impact on the lives of children. Dave Pelzer writes about a young boy who was subject to abuse by his mother. He would feel fear, shame, disdain and dread. This trauma impacted his mental and physical health, as well as his perceptions of others. Nearly 700,000 children in America are abused each year.
Dave’s mother Catherine Roerva Pelzer beat him for years and made him suffer countless physical abuse over the years. His mother detested people like dave, making her unhappy and feeling self-loathing. One night her drinking caused him to be incredibly savage. Dave was “accidentally” stabbed when she was confronted by her mother. We can conclude that dave has distorted perceptions. He believes that the attack was accidental and that his mother wouldn’t have done it. We have ample evidence to show that dave’s mom intentionally did everything he did. A loving mother would never stab her child or allow this to happen. Dave is more likely to act out in extreme ways than other children when he feels unsafe and fearful from physical abuse. This is what I have found to be the “battered-child syndrome”. The condition occurs when children are subject to serious physical abuse (Tomlinson L. 2019 December 5). This can include broken bones, subdural haematomas, inability to thrive, skin injuries or delicate tissue swellings. One of the most common reasons children suffer from battered-child syndrome or abuse is because their parents are either alcoholics or have personality disorders. Dave’s mother was not able to explain his actions. This made him even more fearful. Dave’s mother forced him to question every decision he made. His mother punished Dave to slow down his mental growth. Perhaps in an attempt to make him more dependent on his mother. Dave’s mom would brainwash her son to say “I’m just a boy” and then force him to do the same. Her mother also encouraged abuse, making everyone feel like she controlled them. This was done by punishing Dave for every reason she could imagine. His mother said she once saw him playing in the grass. It was an offense according to her rules. Dave immediately responded, “I have never played on grass.” He quickly began to wonder if his answer was correct. He was immediately met with the punch-to-the-face response from his mother. It was clear that he had committed an error in some way. He was in complete confusion because the rules he was told to follow were somehow still not followed. His mother abuses Dave. Pelzer does not know why. His mother’s cruelty and manipulation of Dave is beyond comprehension. Neglecting and abusing children negatively impacts both psychological and neurological development. Family abuse patterns are often passed down from one generation to the next. A number of psychopathologies later in life can result from adverse childhood experiences. These conditions can lead to personality disorders in children. There are impairments in self-functioning, interpersonal functioning, and personality disorders that can affect social functioning, decisions, and personality (ej levey 2016, 2016). Everybody is affected differently by abuse, and it depends on how each personality trait, as well family, operates.
Children can be abused by their families, regardless of their religion or ethnicity. Abusive behavior is not caused by one thing. It can be caused by many factors. Abusive guardians have a tendency to be less stable and loving with their children. His mother seems to have remorse for Dave and intended to keep him in a state of powerlessness, desolate, fear, and despair. He can’t have friends or relationships with anyone so she makes him wear the exact same clothes everyday. People hate him so much that they even push him to suicide. Despite the hardships of his life Dave is unable to resist Mother. Even though he is too young, he soon realizes the importance to preserve his dignity. This information is reliable and can be compared with other sources. It helps to explain how abuse can cause children not to develop normal social and emotional skills.
For a long time, children’s well-being has been influenced by the emotional well being of their mothers. This study suggests that child abuse’s effects can be significantly reduced by the psychological wellbeing of the father. A mother’s unfavorable impact on a child’s psychological well-being can be detrimental. The effect of this is especially evident in children who are abused. Dave isn’t as hurt when his father is at home. Dave’s father, who was washing dishes, said to Dave that he would be leaving the crazy house sometime in the near future. Dave is relieved by this. Later on, Dave’s controlling mom stops him from helping his father. Dave’s father constantly tells Dave that he is sad for everything. Dave’s deep love for his father gave Dave hope. He even named his son after him, forgetting his dad’s powerlessness. Dave was at least able to rely on his dad for protection and comfort. His dad did give him some love but his dad was still a terrible parent. He was passive and wouldn’t intervene to stop the abuse. Dave was lucky to have a father like this. When the mother and father were both found to be less emotionally healthy, it had a significant impact on the kid’s social growth, particularly for males.
There are good reasons to believe that the environmental and genetic transmission of mental issues will continue to impact Dave and his future. We were surprised to see Dave become a great father and a Christian, ending the cycle. Additionally, he joined a military airforce unit and became a spokesperson for child exploitation. This allowed him to share his beliefs and encourage others to overcome their difficulties. His life outlook is now much more positive. It is important for caregivers to help their children understand their emotional well-being. Although parents’ behavior and attitudes can impact the lives of their children, it does not make them less strong. Children who have been abused often develop multiple personalities or borderline personalities. There may even be a connection between abuses and a specific alternative personality. MPs and BPs change as they experience overpowering emotion or when there are conflicts. The possibility of an angry child due to maltreatment is one example of how the character rotation and MPs can occur. The child is taught anger is not a healthy emotion. The feelings build up and can cause a surge of emotion when repression stops ( Wilbur, C.B. 1984). A parent with a real psychological disorder should be able to live with children. This is in line with other sources and explains how abuse can affect personality and impact on a person’s mental health.
Child abuse is a very common issue. Children, their families, and communities all feel the effects. It can cause changes in the psychological and social development of the victim, which could lead to their involvement in potentially dangerous behavior later. Recognizing instances of child abuse is a crucial task for family doctors. Their role is critical in identifying abuse in children and bringing it to the attention of social workers to stop further abuse. His mother is forced to lie to others about her child’s wounds. She uses scare tactics to get Dave to lie to doctors about the time she stabbed him. It’s quite shocking that the doctor doesn’t realize Mother is lying but still does not stop her abuse. Dave’s abuse was evident by the fact his friends and teachers, as well as doctors and neighbors, are blind to the fact that he was being abused. Dave is almost done with life by the time he enters fifth grade. His teachers bully and direct him to murder himself. His siblings also consider him the ‘family servant’ and often hit him. Despite the horrible torment Dave endures, his life doesn’t seem so sad. His substitute teacher is one example of someone who shows him kindness. The book doesn’t explain why Dave’s substitute teacher allows him to stay after school. But, it was suggested that she could discern that Dave is worried about his family. The fact that substitute authorities would not accept the Pelzer family’s excuses suggests the 1970s had a low level of open awareness about abuse. Individuals were therefore more likely to ignore maltreatment in those years than they would be today.
By 1971, Dave has gotten so used to his maltreatment–something no human ought to ever need to go through, let alone have such a cruel lifestyle become the normal reality. Dave is made to steal by his mother, who also punishes him for taking food that was not his. He still fears the unknown. But he is learning to resist and self-preserve. Despite being wounded, Dave continues to trust and rely on Mother. Dave has never lived a life apart from Mother’s, which may explain why he confides to her. Attachment Disorders, psychiatric disorders that can affect young children with emotional attachment problems, are possible. Attachment disorders are most common in children who have experienced severe difficulties or problems in their early relationships. You may have witnessed them being neglected or abused emotionally or physically. There are two types: reactive attachment disorder (RAD) or disinhibited social involvement disorder (DSED). RAD children are more likely to have negative interactions with their parents in their early years. They don’t need to seek comfort from guardians when they are stressed. They may seem to have no emotions when interacting with others. They might be troubled or anxious while participating in everyday activities. Children with DSED are not afraid to meet new people. They are happy, normal children who will often talk to strangers. They will sometimes go along with strangers if they’re placed in an unfamiliar situation. We can conclude that Dave would have DSED based on the information provided. He was strong-willed, but not totally repressed. At least some decent relationships with his father, little brother, and teacher.
